Today I was sitting at work, in a red truck, just thinking about the day. For some reason when I woke up this morning I felt a sense of being just blah, and for the first time in a long time I allowed that feeling to carry into work with me.
I am big on the concept of leaving things at the door. When I walk in—or rather get out of my vehicle at 6:35 in the morning—I usually leave the stress and most of the things bothering me in my pickup truck and go into work with a smile on my face. Today the smile was there on the outside, but on the inside I was miserable. My back was bothering me, and it seemed like everything was putting me in a bad mood.
I guess it didn’t help that I found out my assigned truck had been driven by someone else. The only spare we had available was a manual transmission, and my truck for the time being is an automatic. The driver who used it doesn’t normally drive the manuals we run, so my truck ended up being used.
When I checked it over, I noticed the body of the truck had been left dirty. That would have been annoying any day of the week, but today it was extra annoying. When I addressed it to my boss, he just stared at me and said something about how he had gotten complaints about me leaving bodies dirty before and that I should just clean it or drive the other truck because he didn’t have time for it.
Needless to say, that is probably the closest I’ve come in a long time to almost crossing a line with a manager. I didn’t come looking for an immediate solution except maybe something simple like “just drive the other truck and address yours later.” Instead, it felt like my concern was dismissed and flipped back on me by bringing up complaints that were supposedly from last year—complaints I had never heard about at the time, weren’t brought up then, and weren’t even mentioned during my review.
Throughout the day I was again met with the highway and time to just think. I made my normal phone calls, checked in with people, and vented to a coworker about my interaction that morning. Sometimes it’s necessary to just let it out and get some feedback.
As the day drew on, I found myself sitting and waiting to be loaded. I was staring out the windshield at the red hood of the truck and the yard in front of me. It was in that moment that I realized I had overreacted that morning and allowed my bad mood to walk through the front door of work with me, which is something I normally try very hard not to do.
In that moment I composed a quick text to my boss. Nothing big or extravagant, just a simple message:
“Hey bossman, just wanted to say I’m sorry for the attitude earlier. Having a rough day and my back hurts, so it’s putting me in an off mood. I’ll address my truck later, don’t worry about having the other driver do it.”
I knew I had been wrong in how I approached the situation and was trying to correct it. After I sent that message, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. It felt like I had started to make things right, and in doing so I made the rest of my day a little better.
While I’m driving, I often look for the lesson or reflection of the day. Today the lesson was simple: we all have stresses in life and things that will throw us off center. Bad mornings happen. Pain happens. Frustration happens.
What matters is how we handle those moments when they show up.
It does no good to go off half-cocked at someone, to let frustration take control, or to intentionally seek conflict. Sometimes the hardest thing to do is step back, take a breath, and admit when you brought the wrong energy into a situation.
Today I had to do exactly that.
And sometimes the right direction in life isn’t about never getting it wrong—it’s about recognizing when you did and making the effort to set things right.
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